Run Like Hell

The holidays are a bit of a dead period in terms of new clients. Sometimes an acute situation drives people to separate around the holidays, but people who have been thinking about leaving for a while generally hold out so as not to ruin the holidays for their families. As a corollary, January and February are usually busy for me as those same people trickle into my office. In other cases, people wrestle with the decision for years before getting up the nerve to talk to an attorney.

I'm always interested to learn what leads to a client's first visit, especially the ones still struggling with the decision to separate. It's frustrating because I want to help every client I see, but that first and most critical decision - whether to separate - is a personal decision, not a legal one, so I spend most of my time in those consultations pretending I'm a therapist, not a lawyer.

If you are one of these Hamlet-onian individuals standing paralyzed between an unhappy marriage on one side, and the prospect of a bitter divorce on the other, I invite you to join me in an experiment. Go to iTunes (or the legal music downloading service of your choice!), and purchase the latest album from The Airborne Toxic Event called "All At Once."

First off, if you are unfamiliar with Airborne Toxic, you're welcome! :-)

Now for the experiment. Put on your jogging shoes and head for your favorite treadmill, elliptical, or (if you're like me) empty industrial park. Whatever your normal running distance may be, add an extra 5 minutes so you're sure to reach that point where you have to rely on attitude and a kick-ass running song to get you through. As soon you feel yourself reach that point, cue up the title track on your new favorite album, "All At Once." It's a great song with a straight, galloping rhythm, but more importantly the lyrics are a piercing, perfectly drawn ode to the brevity of life.

Right as the song hits the bridge your legs will involuntarily kick into another gear you didn't know you had. You realize that today, and every day, we are all running like hell from our own mortality and that the only real satisfaction we ever get is in that escape.

Now, right as you feel yourself getting lightheaded, but before you let off on the throttle, ask yourself one question: If you're running like hell away from death, what are you running toward? If your husband or wife is part of the image that comes to mind, you're good. If it's anything else, it's time that you and I had a talk.