The Only Rule is... There are NO Rules!

They say the States are the laboratories of American democracy. If that's true, then domestic violence court (a/k/a "50B court" or "DVO court" if you're in the know) is the laboratory of divorce law. I can't tell you how many divorces get settled quick and dirty under the pressure of a pending domestic violence trial, circumventing the normal family law process with often unpredictable results.

Sometimes people need a domestic violence protective order. There's no debating that point. A special dynamic exists between people in a romantic or familial relationship, which breeds a special kind of violence when things go bad. The DVO statute is meant to offer special protection to victims of such violence. Often, though, DVO litigants are just as interested in their marital claims as they are in the outcome of their DVO case.

Some attorneys object to settling custody, alimony, or property issues using a DVO claim as leverage. It bastardizes the purpose of the statute, which (the argument goes) is strictly tailored to protect victims of domestic violence, nothing more.

Hogwash. If that's how you feel, God bless you - go work at legal aid where the taxpayers paying your salary don't let you negotiate anything outside the 50B complaint. My clients pay my salary, and they expect me to worry about the things important to them. They expect me to use the laws, not proselytize about them. Don't get me wrong, I have those conversations with clients all the time. But when I do it's because I don't think we can use the law in a particular way, not because I don't think we're supposed to.

I am often retained by clients after they have taken out a DVO complaint against their spouse or significant other. Sometimes, the opposing side is willing to negotiate a favorable settlement of divorce issues in exchange for a dismissal of the DVO charge. Recently, an attorney representing the DVO defendant took a hardline stance with me, insisting that his client would not "negotiate with a gun to his head." He wanted the DVO dismissed before we settled other matters.

I admired his moxie, but even he understood his position was untenable. Victims of domestic violence are also husbands, wives, mothers, and fathers. So are the perpetrators. They don't put on different hats depending on which courtroom they're sitting in. They also don't have the time or money to draw neat intellectual lines between the need to feel safe and the need to know how they will pay for groceries next week. I explain this to my own clients all the time, especially when I represent the party accused of domestic violence.

What this attorney was really saying was that he liked his chances of winning the DVO case and didn't intend on pushing his client to accept a less favorable custody or child support arrangement in exchange for my client dismissing the DVO. All I can say is, I hope he feels the same way when I'm done cross-examining his client!