A Wink and a Nod to the Audience...

Being "self-referential" has a long and distinguished history in the theater, from Shakespeare's "play within the play," to Ferris Bueller narrating all the way through his "Day Off." In that fine tradition, this entry will be an online essay about child custody in an online world.

Not too long ago, I tried a "relocation" case there Mom wanted to move out of state with her two small children to be closer to her parents. I represented Dad, who wanted the children to stay here in North Carolina. The judge allowed Mom to move, but gave my client liberal visitation rights, including a mandate that Mom establish a webcam at her new residence so Dad could "visit" his children online.

It turns out our judge was a few months ahead of the curve. Recently, the North Carolina General Assembly passed a law clarifying that online mediums like email, Skype, and even online video gaming could be the subject to custody orders by North Carolina judges.

Arguably, this was the law already. Judges are generally empowered in North Carolina to order parents to do anything the judge determines to be "in the best interests of the child." The value of this new law, however, it two-fold. If a judge didn't know these avenues were available to parents to communicate with their children, now it's part of a familiar statutory scheme all judges rely on. If a judge was already experimenting with online contact as a formal means of visitation, the law also makes it clear these new online options should supplement, not replace, traditional in-person visitation.

If you find yourself in a situation where your former partner is now living, or plans to live, a great distance from you, "virtual visitation" is an issue you should be discussing with your attorney. In my experience, if your judge isn't already thinking about online visitation options, he or she will probably be open to the idea as long as you take the time to present evidence about it. Make sure your judge knows you are Internet savvy. Make sure you explain to the judge what Skype is and why it's important to put online access to your children in your custody order. I think you'll be pleasantly rewarded.